A Psychotherapist talks about MLMs - part 2
The Cult Connection and the Impact of Shame
In this article, I’m continuing my exploration of MLMs which began with part 1.
I would describe MLMs as a kind of cult. Is that fair? Or is it more of a religion?
MLMs are commercial as opposed to religious cults. As a psychotherapist, I want to highlight that with destructive cults, it's not the theological, spiritual or political beliefs that concern me, but the structure and social influence processes used which are psychologically damaging and profoundly unethical. The psychiatrist and psychologist who originally studied what is now called coercive persuasion or thought reform back in the 1960s identified eight interlocking factors that constitute psychologically dangerous practices and MLMs feature almost all of them.
I could say a lot more about this but we can boil it down to this list of six techniques from the 1996 book ‘Cults in our Midst’:
Keep the person unaware of what is going on and how she or he is being changed a step at a time.
Control the person's social and/or physical environment; especially control the person's time.
Systematically create a sense of powerlessness in the person.
Manipulate a system of rewards, punishments and experiences in such a way as to inhibit behaviour that reflects the person's former social identity.
Manipulate a system of rewards, punishments, and experiences in order to promote learning the group's ideology or belief system and group-approved behaviours.
Put forth a closed system of logic and an authoritarian structure that permits no feedback and refuses to be modified except by leadership approval or executive order.
If you’ve read any accounts of people’s experiences with cults like Scientology or Heaven’s Gate or NXIVM or churches like City Impact, Destiny or Arise, you’ll likely recognise these.
MLMs use all of them. In summary, you are continually deceived and emotionally manipulated right from the very start with lies of omission and clever disinformation delivered by ‘true believers'. They will absorb all your time and energy to wrap you in an MLM cocoon where your new MLM-coloured identity is praised and your prior self is denigrated and demeaned. It will leave you feeling disempowered and ashamed, but all dissent is ruthlessly suppressed. Their system and products are unique and ‘perfect’ so it’s all your fault that you’re failing.
Religion and MLMs also have a long history of being intertwined. Some Christian communities endorse the Prosperity gospel which equates wealth with virtue and struggle is seen as a sign of weak faith. In the US, MLM companies like Amway, Shaklee, and Herbalife have circulated widely within such churches, sometimes with the direct endorsement of church leaders. Gloria Copeland, of Kenneth Copeland Ministries, was reportedly involved in Shaklee and encouraged followers to pursue MLMs as faith-based paths to prosperity. In the 1990s and 2000s, members of the Worldwide Church of God used MLMs such as Amway and Shaklee to generate income while remaining within their insular faith communities. These groups provided built-in social networks that could be mobilised as downlines, with spiritual obedience blending into financial recruitment. The structure of MLMs fits easily into high-control churches, where authority is rarely questioned and personal outcomes are framed in moral or spiritual terms.
As a local example, Kiri Tamaki is an Australian National Vice President for cosmetics and nutrition MLM Arbonne as well as being co-pastor of the Australian branch of Destiny Church alongside her husband, Samuel Tamaki. Samuel is Brian’s son and his heir apparent. Kiri’s instagram intermingles Destiny and Arbonne content, adding a layer of spiritual authority to already potent emotional appeals. It’s a concerning dynamic when vulnerable members of a faith community are encouraged to buy into a commercial structure with a well-documented failure rate.
As well as churches, often there are MLM links with ‘Wellness’ and Conspirituality groups too. Another local example is anti-vaxxer group Voices for Freedom’s Claire Deeks who is a Platinum Wellness Advocate for essential oils MLM doTerra. At one point, the VFF website had a VIP programme which linked to content promoting doTerra essential oils. When this was spotted, VFF claimed it was all a ‘mistake’ and removed it. In fact, when you look closely at its essential structure, VFF itself could be viewed as a slickly marketed quasi-MLM where conspiracy theories and merch is the ‘product’ with Claire, Libby, and Alia firmly ensconced at the top.
To get an idea of their business ‘ethics’ (I’m using that term loosely), both Arbonne and doTerra were among the 16 MLMs who got FTC warning letters for making false COVID and income claims back in 2020. No surprises there.
Is there a particular kind of person vulnerable to or targetted by MLMs?
MLM members are coached to look for people who are vulnerable and then sell them (false) hope. Maybe they’re a bit socially isolated or hungry for adult company because they’ve shifted out of paid work into being a stay-at-home mother. Maybe they’ve recently moved to a new city and don’t have a friendship circle yet. It could be for their partner’s career (e.g. military spouses) or they’re a uni student who has moved away from home - evangelical and Pentecostal churches target this demographic too. Maybe they are church-going women who’ve been led to believe that working outside the home is only acceptable for men and who want to financially contribute to their family.
The MLMs initial pitch is that it’s an easy way to make some extra money from home part-time and all you need is a mobile phone and a social media account. What have you got to lose? But this starter pack would help if you’re serious. Then you can ‘embody the brand’ and post selfies on your instagram showing your great new family life and all our great products. You’re a fearless go-getter who’s doing what needs to be done to help your family or to avoid increasing your student debt. Don’t listen to those nay-sayers, they’re wage-slaves and dream-stealers. They’re just envious that you’re now a boss-babe!
This story all switches later when doubts creep in. If you speak up or don’t make your quota targets, your upline will publicly criticise you in front of your MLM peers. “Did you think you could get a big income for nothing? If you’re not making money, it’s because you’re not putting the work in. You’ve only got yourself to blame”. To avoid being publically humiliated, you start buying more stock than you're selling right now and hide it away to become ‘garage-qualified’. You’ll be encouraged to attend the MLM conventions which are like evangelical church rallies inducing breathless hypomania with music, spectacle, and heart-felt testimony from MLM celebrities about how anyone can make it big - if they just want it enough. And you do want it, right?
Speaking as a psychotherapist, what they are exploiting here is the emotion of shame. We feel shame when psychologically important relationships that we can depend on are either threatened (or absent) because of things we did or didn’t do or the other person did or didn't do. Healthy shame is meant to motivate us to repair the bond but shame can also be exploited to form a ‘feeling trap’ via what sociologist Thomas Scheff calls a ‘shame-shame’ spiral. Initially, the love-bombing and encouragement that new MLM recruits get feels great for someone who’s self-esteem has taken a knock.
Once the MLM absorbs more and more of your time and you’re disconnected from friends who don’t want to come to yet another product party and start avoiding you, that shame returns double. Add to that all the little deceptions you’re encouraged to engage in which fuel feelings of fraudulence and imposter syndrome. “I’m less successful than I pretend”. And the deceptions, losses and toxic shame just keeps growing.
“If I do quit, I’m admitting defeat. It’ll just prove I wasn’t good enough or it wasn’t the right product”. Most new MLM members quit within six months to a year. But now they’re even more ashamed, desperate and vulnerable. “I feel stupid. I don’t want to tell anyone. Maybe I’ll try a different MLM and recover my losses that way.”
For those who stay in or who cycle through different MLMs, this involvement can become a behavioural addiction akin to problem gambling. Marriages and relationships are wrecked, houses are lost and personal bankruptcies blossom like flowers.
Sadly, the underlying problem was never the person, the problem was built into the structure. In the final part of this series on MLMs, I’ll be exploring what to do when someone you care about is ensnared by one.
Yes I recognise this. Larry Thompson created his 'wealth building programme' which was a course designed to suit any MLM company. I was on a call in Scotland in the early 90's where Thompson was presenting this course (workbooks and cassette tapes) as some kind of selfless sharing of his secrets to success. His big point was that because he was no longer associated with any MLM (or network marketing) organisation he was able to give independent guidance through his courses. In the Q&A I pointed out (rather obviously I thought), that his programme was the product and it was designed to exploit the networks that already existed. There was silence followed by the mumbling of an offline conversation. He asked me if I wanted my money back for the course and suggested that I 'didn't appreciate the value' and I was 'negging'. After a brief fractious exchange which I can't accurately recollect the call was brought to an abrupt close. I was later spoken to by my upline about being 'negative' and it was not good for him to be surrounded by negativity. So I asked him how many sets of the courses had in stock. He admitted to having a few, adding that he was considering giving it away free to everyone in his downline because, 'it was so powerful'. Within the space of that same conversation he managed to convince himself it was 'too valuable' to give away. I later became convinced through a series of side conversations at meetings and conferences that all the 'successful' people had bought their way into their marketing positions. They were extremely vague about what they sold and I came to believe that most of them had not sold a single item. I was looking for a lifeline at the time after a disastrous business venture.